Ashley's Confession

I don't really have a whole lot to say today guys. Well, I haven't had much to say in a minute but this has been on my heart all morning and I know that I'm not the only one that can glean something powerful from the words to this song. These are the lyrics to a song sung by the Christian Alternative band Third Day. The words are very simple but profound, heart-felt and sincere. So this is where I am right now. Be good . . .

Take My Life:

How many times have I turned away?
The number is the same as the sand on the shore
But every time you've taken me back
And now I ask you do it once more
Chorus
Please take from me my life
When I don't have the strength
to give it away to you
Please take from me my life
When I don't have the strength to
give it away to you Jesus
How many times have I turned away?
The number is the same as the stars in the sky
And every time you've taken me back
And now I pray you'll do it tonight

Church vs. God

So I have a bit of an issue. It's nothing new but this is the first time that I'm well, posting it online for everyone to read. I will be the first person to admit that I have flaws, issues, hang-ups - the whole nine but when it comes to my life as it applies to church I guess I get a little confused. I don't even really think that I'm confused I think that people in church are more confused than I. I've struggled with the ubiquitous hypocrisy that I've seen in church for a while now. My main thing is how people can constantly lie to themselves and think that their relationship is with the people in the congregation and not with God. So concerned with who sees you doing what or who might find out. Talking out of both sides of your mouth and telling people what not to do and pretending that you're without sin or flaw. The quote that I'm about to use might raise hairs but it's from one of my favorite rap artists, Jay-Z. In a song on his latest AMERICAN GANGSTER Jay-Z addresses this issue in a song aptly entitled "Ignorant Shit". He repeats this phrase . . . "Let's stop the bull sh**ttin'. Til we all wit' out sin let's quit the pulpittin'." Maybe that's a paradoxical analysis but it makes sense to me. I mean really . . . who are you to judge my relationship with God? I guess I've said all that to say that confusion lies in ones unhealthy relationship with church people/members of the body and not with God himself. We all struggle and deal with things but until you can say that your life is spotless, I feel like you're out of place giving anyone any type of direction. My "beef" is only with the people in church that hold positions in the church that govern over the lives of God's people. I'm assuming people don't take into account how serious this is. Any thoughts?