Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Layoff Relationships

I got a good chuckle when I opened my eyes this morning. Habitually, when I wake up in the morning I slide my phone open to see if there are any missed calls or texts. This morning I had a few and one of them was from a guy that I was talking to a little while ago. Lately he's been trying to get back "in there" and I'm just not havin' it. Typical layoff relationship. Huh? Just listen. First, let's pair analogies. You're unemployed and you're desperately seeking work. I mean, you're beyond qualified and immensely frustrated. You want a good job but they don't seem to be available. So, you settle. You settle for a job opening with a company that has overtly expressed it's lack of growth potential. Oh but it looks good. You'll get some benefits and the whole nine, but not for the long hawl. No this is totally temporary. The pay's good too but still it's temporary. You twist your mouth and think briefly. "I'll take it! Shucks, I got bills to pay!" Now you know good and well that if they don't lay you off in six months to a year that you're going to have to quit them when the right job comes along. Well, that is if you're not too distracted with what has your attention at the moment...

Now, let's liken that to a relationship. You're single and have a desire to be in a relationship. Frustrated isn't even the word for the way you're feeling. All the good ones seem to be taken, but you get an offer. He's good looking. Tall, dark, and handsome. Smells like a dream. We've heard and reitereated the old adage, "Never judge a book by it's cover" but let's face it, sometimes the cover is far more interesting than the content. But still... here you go... "I'll take it! Shucks, I got needs that need to be met!" So you spend time together. Bored out of your mind but it's attention. That's something, right? Uh uh! You know good and well that six months to a year down the road, you're either going to get "laid off" or you're going to have to quit him for a good gig. Well, that's if you're not too distracted and complacent with him to realize the good gig when it comes along. Six months to a year of time wasted that could've been spent getting yourself together for what you really needed. Interesting...

The good jobs don't always start out paying the greatest though. You've got to prove yourself before you can come out on top. But there is definte growth potential there. A future. Now, THAT'S something. Needless to say, I've been ignoring the overt "job" offers I've been receiving lately to avoid being distracted when a "real gig" comes along. I just laughed to myself when I read the text and that's where all of this layoff stuff came from. lol!!!! But it makes sense, doesn't it?

So, I guess I went through all of that to ask a few simple questions:

1) Why do we have a tendency to settle for the layoff?

2)Would you rather be miserable in a "nowhere" or "layoff" relationship or single and "frustrated"?

3)Lastly, have we gotten so used to and complacent with deadend "jobs" that we're intimidated by the work wrapped up in a "job" with a future? (By "job" I mean relationship)

Have a great day guys!


Ashley M. said...

Girl that was the bomb! U betta preach! I'm gonna post that on fb! Thanks.

~Submitted by S. Todd

peaceful said...

I will leave ths Seek ye first the Kingdom of Heaven and all.............of His rightouesness and all........of these other things shall be added unto you!And you know who this is stay focus!

Ashley M. said...

Rockwill0426 responded via email with:

Well number 1 settling is a sign of weakness. Why settle, when you know you are at a dead end? Yes I would much rather be single and frustrated then with someone and alone. I think people are afraid to work in relationships, so someone loses a job, where is his mindset is he sitting playing video games or does he have a vision and goals. Is he waiting for the bus come, or is he complaining because there was a slight detour. He's not a failure. He's not a deadend he just hit a bump in the road. You can tell when someone means business and when they are just running their flap and as my mother used to say marking time. Men and women need to raise their standards in relationships.....and if you don't come close you have to go, but if i know you mean business i am going to hold you down. Detour will always get you back on the right track. So check the resume, if he has what's Expected then hire him/her.