Well, damn! Yesterday’s blog concerning a woman’s mistake caught a little flack from my bloggers that are actually in relationships. Blog flack – the good kind that makes us talk, agree, disagree, or agree to disagree. And ironically enough, all of that happened, which I think is great. Some of you may disagree. Let me quickly explain my reasoning behind the statement “Too much physical contact, especially in public”. You all saw the question that was posted to counter Mistake #1. Let me just say that I believe that a woman’s connection to her man is FAR MORE than physical. The same goes for the man in that relationship. I am in no way a relationship expert. Believe me! I’m the Queen of relationship mistakes and I started this mini-series with that in mind so that we’d all get the help we needed. I will say that I think that women mistake touching as meaning “Oh we’re so connected.” That’s not always true. I’m not the PDA type. That’s just me, readers. I’m not bad-mouthing anyone that does it relentlessly and I would like to just go ahead and clear the air (this is not an apology for what I said). I will say, however, that I have some relationship things to work on when dealing with men. These are personal issues that I’m not ashamed to out to you all. So I’m not lovie-dovie – I’ll work on it. I’m also not going to renig on what I said about Mistake #1. On to Mistake #2 . . .
Mistake #2 – Appealing to a man’s sexual side rather than his emotional side.
Seeing as how this was meant for the men to talk about I think we’ll let the ladies chime in today (like they did yesterday) and give us some positive and negative feedback on this matter. We are all naturally sexual beings. Some of us more than others. Yes, it’s true that sex (more so great sex) aids in the connection that you have with your partner, but seeing as how sex was and is designed as an emotional connection I have a bit of a tag question and I believe I’ve asked this before . . . Why do you all think women rush to the sex aspect before tapping into a man’s emotions? Let me know . . .
3 comments:
MommyMo would like to reply :)
I think that's a pretty easy answer. Most women think that sex is the way to a man's emotion... so if they give up the goodies...they feel like the rest of him should be open.
I agree with that being a pretty simple answer as well. I'll keep it short. I think a lot of women forget that men have the ability that we don't and that is detaching themselves emotionally. Women can do this but it takes MUCH practice. It's not as easy for us. When there is an emotional attachment the physical connection is out of this world. But let's be real . . . when you know that there is nothing but a physical connection that relationship gets boring and goes sour fast! And this isn't just for the guy. We get just as bored. I just feel that it's more important to tap into that HEmotion before jumping into bed. That part is easy. Once you've conquered or gotten to the heart of him you've made a major accomplishment. That's all I have to say . . . about that.
RockWill replied -
though I didn't think I'd answer today's blog I will say that "some" women rush to the bed because they are insecure about themselves, and feel that maybe if I give him that special part of me then I'll get him.................eeh wrong! When you can make love to a man's mind and his heart and vice versa then you've got something going. what I've learned is sex is a perk, if you don't have the foundation of relationship, then you have nothing, which by the way hate to be graphic but Jill Scott said it perfectly ...............started simple massage'n on my temple pinching at my mountain peeks that a sister's into...................she goes on to say all that this cat did, cream lava on her skin and neck, dude is plowing like he's making beats, on her back old fashioned is renewed. She says I gotta thank him later if I can remember, talks about all she's doing, things that she learned from her ancestors, feeling like she did some good twerks on dis dude, he's curled up (I'm paraphrasing).......................she gives props to her neck a da woods, she puts him to sleep..............................but she's left feeling ......................EMPTY! Some women do that because that's the only stimulation that particular man wants, nothing else matters. Why I think women rush to the bed instead of the emotions is because they are kind of insecure......................if a man has nothing to chase, nothing to go after, because we freely give it, he has nothing to work at, and we as women can't make him. Not saying that I haven't given my goodies to a dude other than my husband, but until I learned the art of Self-esteem and being in love with me, it was easier to get to the HEmotions or MENtality of a man. I've learned that a lot of men that are looking for RELATionship don't want sex first they just that RELATionship. The perks will come! There are a slew of men who want that anything else.........................leaves one feeling...............EMPTY seeking answers.
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